How To Stand Up For Yourself After Giving Birth

Of course, it is always important that you can stand up for yourself, but even more important is when a woman has just given birth. The arrival of a newborn child entails enormous physical and psychological changes… as well as major changes in the woman’s responsibilities, daily routine and ability to sleep.

It is such a vulnerable time in a woman’s life that it is absolutely necessary to stand up for yourself. In other words, you need to learn to set boundaries and ask for help.

As a human being, as a woman and now as a mother, you have every right in the world to express your desires and feelings. Yet we often find it difficult to do so for fear of appearing selfish or helpless.

But your birth and the months that follow are a challenge in several ways. Therefore, you need to make the decision to care about your needs more than the opinions of others.

What does it mean to stand up for yourself?

Standing up for oneself is a social habit – or skill – that means we can defend our rights without stepping on others. Standing up for yourself means, for example, that you:

• Communicates in an honest, clear and direct way.
• That you express your desires, opinions and feelings honestly.
  
• That you defend your rights and needs.
• That you know how to make inquiries and accept or reject the demands that others place on you.
• That you accept compliments and handle criticism.
• That you can do all the above points without fear of others’ reactions or rejections.
• That you do not violate the rights of others or do not respect them through your own communication.

This is not always easy for any of us. Good self-esteem makes it easier to communicate in a natural and confident way, but there is also a certain social pressure, especially towards women, that we should be polite, talented and at the service of others.

Many times, strong attitudes and behaviors are unwelcome and they can even be seen as selfish. Despite this, we must remember to take care of ourselves because it is our first responsibility and there is nothing selfish in it.

We need to stay healthy and strong to take care of our new little baby. It does not work to overlook our own needs to make others happy.

Stand up for yourself after giving birth

The arrival of a new child is a stressful and vulnerable time in a woman’s life. Fatigue, hormonal changes and the fear that comes with taking care of a newborn are all part of this time.

It is a very demanding time period on a physical, mental and emotional level. And many times, behaviors, attitudes, and comments from the other burden make it even harder to bear.

It is very common for family members, friends and acquaintances to be unaware of a new mother’s needs and condition. The excitement of meeting the new addition to the family and the desire to help can sometimes lead to actions that are unintentionally intrusive. What most new mothers need is rest, integrity and time with their inner family circle.

When a new mother receives visitors – whether at home or in the hospital – the uninterrupted flow of opinions and other mothers’ advice can feel overwhelming. But in order not to become uncomfortable, we hold back from expressing what we really feel and need.

At the same time, you may feel shy and weak because you want to ask for help with your child or other household chores. But taking care of a completely dependent newborn is exhausting.

How to stand up for yourself after giving birth

• You only need to receive the visitors you want – and only as long as you want – both at home and in the hospital. Do not be afraid to say no thank you or postpone a visit, or ask the visitors to leave. It’s about taking care of your own needs – as well as your child’s – and others need to respect that.

• Make it very clear that you need to rest. If you find it difficult, remember that these people are not the ones who have to wake up several times a night to take care of your child.
• Do not feel that you have to do everything on your own. Asking for help does not make you uneducated or weak. And asking your partner to do his part does not make you bossy.
• Remember that you are your child’s mother. You are the one who decides how to take care of him or her. You decide whether to breastfeed or give infant formula, sleep together or sleep in separate rooms, use a pram or a baby wrap, etc. Do not take orders from others and do not be afraid to be clear if someone insists. If you need advice, you can ask for it (from whoever you want) or talk to your midwife or someone at the child care center.

Summary

In conclusion, if you are about to have a baby, be prepared to give yourself the space you deserve (and need!). Forget social demands and conventions – what matters is your needs and your child’s needs.

Do not forget your rights and do not be afraid to defend them clearly when necessary. Do not let anyone stop you from enjoying this precious and important time with your family.