Avoid Jealousy When A Sibling Arrives

Never feeling jealous is almost impossible. After all, who has not experienced this feeling at some point in their lives? Therefore, it can be a real challenge for parents to help their children avoid jealousy when a sibling arrives.
Avoid jealousy when a sibling arrives

When a new sibling arrives at the family, jealousy can be a natural reaction to the threat of having to share parents’ love. But while competing for their parents’ love, the little ones can learn a lot. Here’s how to guide them on this journey so you can avoid jealousy when a sibling arrives.

What can you do while you are pregnant with a sibling to avoid jealousy?

The arrival of a sibling child gives rise to many changes in the family. Your older children may have unrealistic expectations while waiting for their siblings. Therefore, you can prepare them as soon as possible to help them and so that you avoid jealousy when their siblings arrive.

The first is to let them know you are pregnant before they hear the news from other people. In addition, you need to explain to them in advance that babies need a lot of care because they can not fend for themselves. To help with this, you can show them pictures or videos of when they were little so that they can more easily understand it.

Also, try to include them when making arrangements for your sibling’s arrival. Some ideas are to show them the pictures from the ultrasounds or let them put their hands on their stomachs and talk to the baby in their stomachs.

This is how you know if you need to take action to avoid jealousy

Although not all children show jealousy in the same way, you may see some or all of the following symptoms:

  • Anger, anxiety, insecurity, sadness. Such feelings can present as physical symptoms such as headache, insomnia or dizziness.
  • Complete distancing from the sibling.
  • They may experience a regression stage and try to imitate the younger sibling. In these cases, they return to behaviors from which they have already grown, for example, they begin to suck on the thumb again.
  • They try to attract attention at all costs, often by being mean to their siblings.
  • They may exhibit aggressive behavior, and even be verbal or physically aggressive and outspoken.
    siblings arguing

How to avoid jealousy when a sibling arrives

Of course, there is no magic formula for how to avoid jealousy when a sibling arrives. But with the right tools, you can help your children channel this feeling in a healthy way. Here are some practical tips:

Set aside time for them

Strive to be with your other children one at a time and set aside time for them alone. This factor is very important so that they do not feel neglected by the arrival of the new baby.

Let them help you

Involve them in the care of their new siblings. Depending on their age, you can assign different tasks to your older children. In this way, you make them feel like an important part of the family. Of course, if they do not want to do that, it’s best you do not force them.

Teach them the importance of understanding

Teach your children the importance of understanding. It is essential that they learn to understand the feelings of others. Now show the benefits of being the oldest or the youngest.

Treat them fairly

Being fair and treating your children equally is the best way to avoid jealousy. Try to give as much of your time and attention to each child.

Although love should be shared equally, in many cases you must give special treatment to one of the children at certain times. In such circumstances, you need to consider the age and personality of the children.

Try to explain to them that equality is not always fair.

Ask for help from other adults

Remind your family and friends not to leave the oldest child out. Otherwise, all your efforts and all your commitment may be thwarted or even crushed by another person close to the child.

Teach them to share

Help them develop their individuality and respect each other. When they grow up, children should know how to share their everyday life with their siblings.

Promote family relationships to avoid jealousy

If you want to avoid jealousy when a new sibling arrives while promoting family relationships, keep these tips in mind:

Do not change the routines of older children

Do not change the routine your children had before the birth of your new baby. Too many changes at the same time can make it difficult to adapt. Make sure that the new sibling, as much as possible, does not coincide with a major change at home or at school.

Do not think that they do not want siblings

Avoid believing that jealousy is a sign that your children do not want a little sibling. In the vast majority of cases, they will eventually love each other in a very special way with time and maturity.

Avoid making comparisons

Do not compare your children. Some of your comments may seem like a simple observation, but just saying them out loud can have a strong impact on your children.

grumpy girl and pregnant mother

Be careful with your comments

Avoid phrases that blame or even misinterpret their actions. For example, if you tell your other children to “stay away from the child” or tell them not to “touch him”, older siblings may reject the younger one.

Correct if necessary to avoid jealousy

Correct bad behavior and prevent them from doing so. Some children may try to get attention by reducing, teasing and threatening the infant.

In this case, do not blame their feelings, but do not let them think it’s okay to be mean to your siblings. Never let an older sibling harm an infant.

In short, completely avoiding jealousy when a new sibling arrives is virtually impossible. But with patience and love, you can help your children deal with these feelings, even if you do not avoid jealousy altogether.

In this way, you teach your children to live together, accept their responsibilities and respect each other.

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